5 years ago

5 years ago today I moved back to Portland from Sacramento. My initial reasoning for moving back home was I found out that my mother had cancer. She spoke of this when she came down to visit me one weekend.

I remember feeling angry and betrayed that she lied to me upon moving to California. I asked her before I was leaving Oregon if she had cancer and she said no. So there it was, December 27th 2004, I packed my car and ventured to CA. Things kinda were bumpy the first couple weeks in CA. I called my mom everyday looking for support and guidance. I felt like a newbie in a big city, though all my family was around me. I missed my mom, my friends and everyone else back in Oregon. Finally, a few months after living there my mom came out for a weekend visit. It was much needed and felt good to have a piece of home with me. It was during that visit that my mom told me the truth. My heart shattered.

I came back to Oregon during Memorial Weekend for a visit. I saw all my best friends, my mom and it was that weekend I decided that I wanted to move back. I remember going to work and trying to figure out a way to tell my boss that I was quitting. When I met up with him, he handed me a note stating that my position had been eliminated due to budget cuts. I took that as a sign and made the final decision. I told my dad and family that I was moving back. I hurt them so much by that decision, and felt terrible, but knew that I wasn't happy where I was and needed to go back.

I woke early on July 1, 2005 and kissed my father goodbye and ventured back to Portland. I ran through the front door and threw my arms around my mom. I finally felt at home again.